This topic reminded me of the time when I was going to make a similar mistake and almost made it. Phew! By sheer luck, my best friend relation is still intact and I know how close I was to ruining this beautiful relation. Yes! Yes! I know how tempting it feels, to fall in love with your best friend. Alas! The other side only “appears” greener. This is the reason why I encourage girls to have gay best friends. Not joking! Seriously! That keeps all such nonsense at bay. *sighs*
Now don’t look at me like I am your enemy or something! I want your happiness people. Let’s see why happiness resides in being ‘only’ best friends-
10. YOU CAN NO LONGER BE YOURSELF
Yes, once you seek to become his girlfriend or her boyfriend, expectations change dramatically for him/her. She/ He will now see you with the sight of love and “lust”. You got to be combing your hair and changing those drowsy lowers before hanging out with him/her. The old clumsy self of you doesn’t come handy once you decide to be his/her date. Are you ready to come out of your comfort zone? Trust me, the charm of the wannabe relationship dips once you are pushed out of your true self.
9. BOTH WILL START JUDGING EACH OTHER
Gosh! Once the deal is signed of you two being in a relationship, the weight of it will fall on your shoulder instantly! Thud! And with it will change the way you earlier used to think about his disgusting habit. Once terms like “spending life together” or “soul mates” or “lovebirds” starts being thrown on you, his irritating habit of sleeping with socks on or her partying till late night will take a toll on your tolerance limits. No matter how much you both understand each other; getting judged is no pleasant situation. I am sure you must be thanking me by now for saving you. *angelic smile*
8. FIGHTS WILL BE MORE INTENSE NOW
Those kiddish pillow fights and punches will give way to emotionally intense and serious fights which can risk even your old best friend relation. As expectations and demands increase, fights can become uglier. Do you want to lose that sweet and sour relation due to such ugly fights? Some of these fights might be deadly to your relation. I am sure by now you would be realizing what a big mistake you were about to make.
7. NO! YOU CAN’T BLUBBER YOUR INSECURITIES
Once you are into a relationship, you are not expected to cry and wail the whole day about how bad your ex was or how apprehensive you are about this relationship. You can’t keep on getting yourself pampered by complaining how fat or ugly you look all the time. You need to “pretend” about how happy you are. You are expected to radiate happiness and not your bygone troubles. Are you ready to stop blubbering about your instant feelings?
6. WHO WILL HELP YOU TO HEAL?
Till today the moment you had a nasty fight with your date, who was your immediate solution? Your best friend! Once this relation changes, to whom will you run to after all those ugly fights? And then don’t come crying that you are left alone! It was you who decided to cross the fine distinctive line between a friend and a date. Be prepared to heal yourself then. You will lose your best healing buddy i.e. you best friend. How can you even think about doing so? *disgusted*
5. NO MORE OF RELAXED AND HONEST FUN
Come-on! Do you want to watch movies on that sofa of yours cuddling together all the time? Well that’s what you should expect once relation changes to a more serious one. No more throwing of pillows and popcorns. No more nonsense fun which you had earlier. Now fun would only be to an extent that will look appropriate from social norms. No more making fun of those chick-flicks, because now you will find yourself like them, into love and your best friend being the love. *sighs* There is still time. Don’t plunge into this mess people.
4. ARE YOU SURE HE/SHE IS THE “ONE”?
No matter how perfect the guy or girl may be, this doubt seems to reside in either of their minds in a new relationship. You were sure that he is your best friend. Can you say further with certainty? Are you sure he is going to be the one you would spend all your life with? Or is it just the temporary surging of your love hormones that is fooling you? *sighs* as a matter of fact, in this doubtful business called love, dates and boyfriends, you will lose your best buddy. So don’t stoop into this mess of whether he is the ‘one’ or not! Everything is going on awesome as best friends, let it be so.
3. WHO WILL BE YOU NEW BEST FRIEND?
Voila! All is not blissful once you have turned your best friend into your date. Rather you lose more than you gain. You have to start your search for your next best friend. And it’s not that easy as finding a date. And now don’t try to put some sense into me by stating that you don’t need a best friend! Nonsense! Who doesn’t need a best friend? Who will further give your relationship advises? Who will hear all those deep dirty secrets you can no more tell to your best friend-turned-boy friend/girl friend? And searching for a good friend who will not back bitch and judge you like this bad world, is hell tough! You still have doubts? Argh! Two more points to go then!
2. NO MORE OF FUN FILLED VACATIONS/TRIPS
How many times post a break-up or major fight, you planned to run away to some exotic location or to a nearby cafeteria with your best friend? I am sure, that fun was on a different scale, than the usual lovebird’s fun. And then you will howl about missing those old fun filled vacations/trips. Now every contact will be taken more seriously and the monotony of similar “love-filled” trips will disgust you for sure. So my advice, keep him/her separate from all this dating stuffs and you will sob lesser for sure.
1. YOU WON’T FEEL COMFORTABLE
I deliberately wanted this to be the last or the most important point injecting your head. Just imagine that he/she knows every embarrassing fact about you. She/he knows how gross you looked when you schooled or how much you spent at that salon next door, to look good! They know all. You can’t pretend to be someone good or decent because they have even watched you flirting in the most demeaning manner. They will know your dirtiest secret about how miserably you failed on your first date or how slyly you cheated on that ex of yours. When there is nothing to hide about, making a fresh start becomes difficult sometimes, because now there will be two copies of your past. One with you and the other with him/her. There will be no provision of distance and space! Don’t even think about dating him. All is going well. Don’t ruin it.I am sure that by now you will be sending me stacks of gifts for saving you of this misery.