10 Reasons why Long Distance Relationships don’t work

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Someone has so rightly said that apart from the first few days of all those beautiful feelings and those feeling of butterfly’s romantic relationships in long run are always messy. Taking a care of relationship is a very complicated issue. Because it’s not just you, it’s also about this person you really care about but who might be having a very different perception of things, compared to you. And if the relationship is a long distance one, things suddenly starts taking a more ugly turn. I remember once talking to a friend of mine whose relationship was going through a very tough time. During that discussion almost every time I asked him why he was ready to carry this burdensome relationship forward his only answer was how much he really loved her and would never want to do anything to hurt her. However when I pointed out that his talk indicates somewhere that he’s also getting bored of her partner, he just said, “How can you not get bored of your partner when the only thing you guys do together is talk on phone”. Long distance relationships usually leaves you with very less options. So what are those 10 reasons when long distance relationships fail even after every hopeful attempt from two cross-country lovers?

10. Different Expectations

  different_expectations

With the start of a relationship starts the never ending process of expecting “something” from your partner. The worst part of this process is that usually partners feel that this “something” needs to be just understood by their partner without even their telling. For example-when a girl enters a relationship she expects some amount of credibility from her boyfriend. She wants that he should make her feel special by either calling or texting her even when his out with his bunch of friends. Well things could be really simple if people would give words to their expectation; however they prefer their silence and then even expect it to be understood. With the relationship turning into a “long distance relationship”, things start becoming more complicated because now due to the physical absence of the partner even understanding words  become  difficult leave aside silence.

9. Issues of trust

issue_of_trust

In that far world which we all have just read about in our fairy tales once you enter a relationship, you trust your partner blindly, neither questioning them on their actions nor doubting them on their deeds. However, unfortunately none of us live in a beautiful fairy world. Back here in our real world, no matter how much you trust your partner, doubts will surely creep in once your relationship becomes long distance. And as it’s always said trust is the most important ingredient of any and every relationship. So one may not even realize when this small issue starts creating major misunderstandings in their relationships.

8. Communication Breakdown

communiaction_breakdown

Yes in today’s technical era you have a plethora of options with which you can take care of the communication gap point, but then no matter how real virtual appears at the end of the day it’s still virtual. So you never feel fully satisfied no matter how long you hangout on Facebook or video chat with Skype. Well the gadgets might give make it very easy for you to stay connected but feeling connected? I personally doubt it!!

7. Missing your Partner

unbearable_missings

 

One of the most common reasons why people enter a relationship is because they want to have that special someone in their life. They want to share everything with them starting from their special moments to their embarrassing part, from their stupid stories, to their moments of joy with someone they consider even more important than their own self .Long distance relationships snatches the beauty of this wonderful bond. Even though you have someone whom you might consider your better half but still in times of joys, sorrow, surprises, challenges you are all alone, facing and solving them just by you. So at times that longing to have someone on your side make you doubt your decision of entering a long distance relationship. The scenario becomes more complicated when you find about your partner’s socialization. However the only possible solution to this unavoidable problem might be to get yourself involved as much as you can and try to take advantage of every technical advancement that this world has seen that might be of use to you to feel as close to your partner as possible.

6. Boring conversations

boring_conventions

I am quite sure most of you have seen that famous Vodafone advertisement in which they are promoting one of their call schemes by devoting it especially to people enjoying the experience of first love. One of the major conclusions that advertisement makes is that if you are in love no matter how much you talk will never be satisfied. Their always be something more that you forgot to mention, something that you wanted to talk about. True! But then also true is the fact that after a certain time period especially in a long distance relationship where the only activity you and your partner are involved in is talking, their might come a point when you’ll feel saturated and not willing to talk on anything under the sun. It is then that you realize that without even your knowing an awkward silences has penetrated somewhere deep in your relationship, making the conversations more and more predictable and boring. Now, even though this is a very common issue, it can be easily solved if taking some time to spice things up.  However as someone has very rightly said that Boredom Is a Choice…and Only Boring People Get Bored! So try finding new dimensions in your conversations or at least make them more interactive. Being humorous can also add up to your conversation.

5. Uncertainty about the future

uncertainity_about_future

One of the major problems with long distance is that they seem to lead nowhere. Trust me it’s very difficult to fight for your love when you don’t even see a bright future together. And most of the times the fight would be less with others and more with your own practical self. The only motivation in such a case can be your love or those feeling of butterflies that you have every time you think of her/him. Well if you really love each other and really want to stay together then you can surely pass this hurdle. However in most of the cases this factor remains one of the very obvious reasons of breakup.

4. Laws Of Attraction

law_of_attraction

No matter how true you are to your partner you cannot undermine the “Laws of Attraction”. With your partner not on your side, clubs can surely prove disastrous. Well I am in no way saying that when one of your partners goes out with their bunch of friends to some night club they are thinking to cheat on you. They just go there to have fun, to dance, hang out with their friends, but how can you deny the fact that with so much options around the possibility of them going astray is quit high. So even though your partner is going out to have just ‘normal’ fun, the temptation is all around her, and the fact that she has to force herself to resist it, is already not a good thing. The solution to the problem is to never miss a chance of hanging out together and then carrying back as many beautiful memories as you can which could act as your support system for at least some time.

3. Fear of getting cheated upon

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The worst part of long distance relationships is the insecurities that repress you as time passes. Away from your partner aware of the fact that there is always a possibility of him getting weak and breaking the ethical code of conduct you start considering your relationship more as a responsibility than a thing to enjoy. No matter how much you trust your partner theirs always this inner voice somewhere deep down warning you, “She’s avoiding me!”  Or “He has started talking a lot about his new colleague. Is he getting attracted towards her! “Well trust me you are not alone. It’s totally normal to feel this way when you’re far away from your partner. Dealing with these feeling needs a lot of maturity and it totally depends on you how you handle it.

2. Constant Fights

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Be it any relationship, fights, argument and debate comes as part and parcel, along with it. But one needs to start worrying when they happen too often and when they lead to a lot of stress and worries. Now in order to keep things working the best possible solution is to solve the conflict together. The real problem starts when partners start treating each other as two opponents having completely different perceptions. What they need to remember is the simple fact that it’s not a war, it’s their relationship and the real enemy is the conflict, not your partner. Thus you have to sort the mess together rather than blaming each other.

1. Jealousy

jealousy

Universally accepted as the strongest emotion this is one thing that can ruin your long distance relationship. Things become worse when couples try to repress this feeling and thus become aggressive and over controlling as a result. So instead one should try to express it and clarify it in a calm and collected manner to your partner.

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