Gone are those days when you could use a cheesy one liner or some movie dialogue to approach a girl, unless of course you want to be mocked in public or be termed as the ‘creepy guy’. In this changing world, girls have become very particular about how a guy acts in front of them. They no longer are the timid, vulnerable sex. They can make you feel weak in the knees and strip you of your confidence in a minute, so watch your every step. If you don’t want to be slam-dunked in the most painful and tormenting category of “possible friend” or “friend zone”; you have struck gold with this article as it presents to you 10 success-guaranteed ways of approaching a girl so that next time if you try to impress someone, you don’t freeze!
10. Be Yourself. No one likes phony guys!
Not as simple as it sounds, this is undoubtedly a positive way to a girl’s heart. Tone down that accent, un-flinch those eyebrows, relax your shoulders and smile. You’re not in a conference. With my personal experience I can write this with utmost confidence that guys who act themselves gather much more attention than guys who try to fake a ‘charismatic personality’ because let’s face it, girls are not naive and dumb. They know how to differentiate between what’s original and what’s made up.
9. Allow your eyes to say the first “Hi”!
No matter how filmy it sounds, eyes are great talkers. They instantly convey your interest to the girl. However, learn to draw a line between a ‘stare’ and a ‘gaze’. She might look away at first but if you have that pleasant look in your eyes which doesn’t creep her out, she’ll definitely look back. You may then smile to ensure that she knows you’re interested. This trick works perfectly well at coffee shops and restaurants.
8. Confident body language
This is one of those tricks which works both ways. When you have that confidence in your walk, when you are comfortable in your own skin, when you are not a mess in the way you carry yourself, you not only multiply the success of your approach manifold, but also create a fair chance of getting approached! Think about it, you walk into a bar intending to approach that girl over the counter and end up receiving the first sign from her side!! How cool is that?
7. Be a little chivalrous
A lot of girls like old school. Chivalry gets their attention faster than some joke. They like it when you let them walk in front of you or call the waiter to order your drink. Chivalry mixed with right amount of dignity and tenderness can work wonders for the first meetings. But just like rest of the points, this one has a catch as well. Beware of the feminists! Lately there has been upsurge in the number of strong headed, I-don’t-need-a-man-to-buy-me-drink girls who rigidly believe in equality of the sexes. Chivalry in front of them is a dead end. So act wise.
6. Every girl loves compliments
Without sounding gay or cheesy, compliment the girl. Make it random and instantaneous. Talk about her eyes or smile or hair and watch her blush. Words like ‘adorable’, ‘beautiful ’and ‘pretty’ help you score much higher than ‘nice’ or ‘great’. Girls have the sixth sense of differentiating between fake and real compliments so make sure you put up your act well. A little flattery is always harmless. Not just it makes her feel good and confident; it also makes her interested in whatever you have to say next.
5. Say NO to past discussions
Instead of telling you what to do, this tip tells you how to avoid a shipwreck from which no one emerges alive. If you are talking to a girl for the first time, NEVER ask her about her past relationship. If you’re running out of things to talk, take an excuse to go to the bathroom and think while you pee. Run out of the window if you have to because even that can be covered up for later. But the moment you ask about a girl’s past in the first meeting, you push yourself into the bottomless abyss of ignorance and indifference. Trust me, she would never want to see you again!
4. Why so serious buddy?
A lot of girls give in to the guys who are humorous. Being able to make a girl laugh is highly assuring. Again, you need to know the difference between the unpaid-jester of the party and the one who makes her night wonderful. Smart jokes, a little slapstick comedy, funny incidents of your life – anything which tickles her funny bone is way to get closer to her. The best part about being witty is that it builds a certain level of comfort which eases the girl and also calms down your own jitters.
3. Conversation keepers
Knowing how to keep up a conversation is just as important as knowing how to start it. When you approach an unknown girl, you obviously know nothing about her and so there aren’t many common topics to talk about. This is where your wit needs to act. Make sure the conversation goes on smoothly. Try to remove awkward silences by talking about random, not-so-personal stuff from your life. Be an observer in order to keep the conversation from getting dreary. DO NOT STARE. Ask her stuff about her life to build up comfort.
2. Have the self-respect to exit when needed
You’re NOT pleading, you’re approaching. There may be times when the stars are not in your favor or the girl you tried to approach likes girls herself (you cannot rule out the possibility, can you?). In such times, show self respect and walk out with dignity. No, you will not be called a loser. But if you keep on trying too hard, you will definitely be the despo-guy-I-met-in-cafe-who-wouldn’t-let-go when that girl talks to her friends about her day’s events. Always remember when to draw the line because your self esteem is way too important than anything else.
1. She’s a girl, not an algebra question
Having said all the points, this one is perhaps the most important because it brings a reality check to the situation. Approaching a girl is not like solving a math equation. There are no fixed formulas and no fixed end results. You may practice about how you have to act but you cannot determine the response you’ll get from her. It varies from person to person. You cannot help it if she’s coming out of a broken relationship or a bad examination at college. Be man enough to accept that it’s a two way process and thus, sometimes, it just doesn’t work. All you can do is keep in mind the tips given above and move on!