That deep flush in your cheeks, that jittery feeling in your stomach and the time when everything in the world seems perfect is a feeling we have all had some time or the other and a lucky few have their love requited and got into a relationship. There are many reasons why the sun sets in lovers paradise, but one of the most common reasons is infidelity. People who cheat in relationships give a variety of reasons for cheating on their partners from getting bored, not being appreciated to getting seduced, but the other person in the relationship is the one who ends up feeling insulted and hurt with their trust broken. Sometimes it’s hard to know when you are being cheated on before it’s too late, but there are certain signals you can watch out for:
10. Sudden change in likes and dislikes
We are all influenced to a great extent by the important people in our lives, especially people we value a lot. We begin or attempt to like all the things they like. We have all at some point of time or other, tried to mold our tastes according to someone we like to be able to impress them. If you happen to notice that your significant other has suddenly begun to like things they previously hated, or changed their opinions on politics, choice of books, movies and even foods rather drastically, it most probably is an indication that they have gotten influenced by someone new in their lives with whom they have been spending a considerable amount of time. If you have not heard of any new friends they have made or any new group they have been hanging out with, it may mean that your partner is cheating on you.
9. Friends and family withdrawal
Usually your partners will always try to please your family members as well as your friend circle and be the goody person in front of them so that they approve of them and like them. But if of late you find that they show less interest in meeting with your family and friends and make particularly lame excuses to avoid going for family functions or parties and outings with your friends, it probably means they don’t care so much about their approval and for that matter associating with them anymore. If they stop wanting to be with the most important people in your life, it means that they are not interested in you anymore or your relationship and are probably planning to leave you soon and also signifies that being with your loved ones and family guilt’s them out for cheating, hence they would want to avoid meeting them. If they appear especially embarrassed and flushed or try to make up by some obnoxious gesture for not coming out for family events with you, it probably means they are guilty and have something to hide.
8. Precautionary questions
Where on one side you all notice your partner getting far too busy to go out with you, sure it may be due to work pressure and other commitments but it raises a red flag when they become too inquisitive about your schedule. it’s ok to ask you if you are going to be home in time for dinner or where you are planning to go with your friends for hanging out, but unless your doting partner is just concerned, it could also mean that they are attempting to fix their schedule of meeting the other one, around yours and to ensure that they will not get caught.
7. Behavior of their friends towards you
Your best friends know every little detail of your life, and every thought that you have ever had. Sometimes we trust our friends more than our partners and if your partner is cheating on you or thinking of leaving you, their friends already know about it. A change in their attitude towards you, probably less friendly or more sympathetic, talking in hush- hush tones and suddenly changing topics when you enter the conversation are sure signs they are hiding something from you, and since their common link to you is your partner it is undoubtedly about them. So if they appear shady and cannot meet eye to eye and try too hard to shrug off any insecurity you might have about your partner, means they are lying and their guilty conscience is acting up.
6. Sex and intimacy
The behavior of female and male partners when it comes to changing behavior during sex or other intimate activities is usually the exact opposite. While men will suddenly begin to appear more caring and loving, even cuddling up more than usual apart from trying to satisfy their partners more during sex, ladies will close down and avoid any sexual contact or any touch whatsoever. When cheating men feel guilty because they are usually cheating, they feel that providing more intimacy, giving thoughtful expensive gifts and satisfying their partner will make up for their mistakes and help throw off any doubt that their partner might, have since he is obviously proving how much he loves her with all the attention and loving. Women on the other hand become less open with their body , apart from just withdrawing from sex by giving excuses that they are too tired or having a headache, they will also stop undressing in front of you and begin covering up more. While no intimacy is a danger to a relationship, if she refuses to acknowledge her changing behavior or address your growing intimacy issues, the reason is she is probably cheating and the guilt is preventing her from getting intimate.
5. Behavior change
Every relationship has its share of fights and misunderstandings, and then the making up afterwards. But if you find that your partner and you are fighting more often, usually over small unimportant things, and your partner is the one to instigate the fight on more occasions than one, it probably signals that the fights are deliberate. Your partner is snappy and in general their behavior towards you is that of avoidance or anger, with not so good mood swings directed negatively towards you. It is a sign that they are not attempting to make the relationship work anymore and their guilt at cheating is probably manifesting itself as anger towards the relationship. Apart from generally moodiness, if your partner seems less than interested in you, missing important events and avoiding lunches and dinners with you, with a plethora of fishy excuses, has stopped complimenting you, where earlier there would be no dearth of appreciation and praises, while generally maintaining a secretive attitude, it could be a sign that he/she is cheating.
4. Increased privacy needs
This is probably one of the most obvious signs that should make you suspicious of your partner. If your partner begins to hide their phone from you or not let you see their messages, where previously their phone privacy was not an issue, or delete their inbox before handing you their phone, it means they have something to hide. Similar behavior when they shut their laptop when you enter the room, or keep it hidden when they are not around, and the browsing history is always wiped clean, is also indicative that they are chatting or in contact with someone they don’t want you to know. Even if they suddenly begin to take their phone calls into the other room out of your earshot, or if you notice them sneaking around at night talking on the phone in whispers it can only mean one thing, unless your partner is a spy, criminal or planning your surprise birthday party: they are cheating on you.
3. Change in regular schedule
Being in a relationship for some time can get you acquainted with not only the little habits of your partner but also their regular schedule. You do this subconsciously, hence if there are any discrepancies, you begin to realize it without meaning to and women are generally better at it than men. Lying about being at the office when their coworkers tell you they have left a long time back, or disappearing for hours claiming to be with a friend you have never heard of, is a danger sign for your relationship. Sometimes you can give them the benefit of the doubt since it might genuinely be due to a sudden change in plan, but if it happens more than once or twice, and especially if your partner doesn’t pick up your call claiming they were busy, or the phone is off since the battery was low, that too quite often, means that they didn’t want you disturbing them while they were with the other special someone, and did not want to have to explain to you about their whereabouts. When you ask them about it and they appear flushed and speak too fast or unconvincingly about what they were doing, it definitely credits the cheating theory.
2. Focus on Appearance
One of the first and foremost changes that you will notice is your partner’s growing attention to their looks and grooming. If you remember, during the first throes of your relationship, when all was roses and butterflies you tried very hard to please your partner and specifically tried to look as good as you could, but with time of course when you got comfortable it stopped mattering so much. If your partner suddenly joins the gym, starts to buy new clothes, perfumes and or jewelry and cosmetics, it is a telltale sign that they are getting dolled up for someone else, someone new in their life. It could be it could be that they are just attempting to follow a healthy routine just for the sake of it but if the importance on appearance is more than natural and they dress up more than usual when they are not going out with you, it signifies trouble in paradise.
1. Money spending
Sometimes a casual search in their wallets or purses or a check in the bank accounts can reveal more than just their financial condition. A receipt for a coffee place for lunch when they said they ate at the office canteen, a jewelry store receipt for an expensive bracelet, watch or necklace, or from a lingerie store that didn’t find its way to you and a lot of dinner payments at date-y restaurants especially after you find out that those days were work nights, means that they are not only lying to you about where they have been, but also spending a lot of money for someone they are lying to you about, and it probably means they have been taking a bite out of the forbidden apple.